Is there anyone else here who is interested in Mara Barls spirituality? I have been following her for a little over a year now and consider myself somewhat of a Mara scholar at this point, like a historian for someone who is still alive, which is probably super creepy but whatever.
She started substacking earlier in 2021, collecting all of her posts into a journal as well as publishing some short essays. She recently published a "glossary of terms" which serves as somewhat of a shortcut to understanding whatever she's on about without having to derive it from context over a period of months as I had to.
Tell us more.
it looks like they took down (or at least changed) their substack, which makes me sad. Is it archived anywhere? Really like what I see so far on her site.
I remember when I was younger it seemed like it would be very fun and sexy to be a hyper-online internet mystic like this but every one I've seen appears to be pretty tortured. Not something one gets into by choice.
I'm an avid reader of her substack as well and find her very interesting. Wouldn't describe myself as a scholar though (lack the time to put in the work beyond just reading her posts)
Would you care to give us a qrd in lue of op? As that little tease seems to have vanished.
That would ruin the fun
I've been soooooo afraid to read her substack but I think I am ready. Wish me luck netanon ^^
I personally won't spare time nor give any respect for someone who makes their theory needlessly esoteric.
She likes .hack//Legend of Twilight which wins my respect regardless regardless of the necessity of esotericism. Though I can understand not wanting to expend the time. It does seem like it will take a lot of it for me to grasp what's going on here.
its not about respecting "theory" its about gawking at the mentally ill
it's not that simple. Mara Barl, Terry Davis, and other schizos are plugged into a different circuit of reality. touched by God. Existing on the forefront of epistemology, they see and hear things differently, make totally novel connections, produce and reproduce them in sensible articulations. The insights are free if you want to glean them.
Well I read the new post and I've been chewing on it for a day. I'm ashamed to say I hadn't read anything but some comics and tweets before. Probably would have really benefited from being able to recognize the characters in the alignment chart. I've been seeing them all over. Whole thing makes much more sense now, even if I'm still filtered by the vocabulary. Shame it takes being unredeemable to be able to see. Wish I had made the effort to read her stuff before disconnection. Wish other people didn't make it seem like they were going to when they weren't. Maybe it's easy enough to recognize me that it doesn't matter. Regardless, I think it's really interesting the way she's dividing connection. I hadn't thought of it that way at all. I've only ever considered connection as a kind of intimate and mutual violation. Maybe connections of the flesh or through the void are different than the electromagnetic kind. I've certainly never gotten pinged in the face by something arriving in the post. Well maybe I could now that USPS sends my daily email. I'll hold what's left of my tongue, because I definitely don't understand, but you can take this as my declaration that I'd like to. Though even if I had tried to read her work, I probably wouldn't have been able to find it interesting before the 31st anyway. If my surface level search engine perusal of astrology is worth anything, and I would hardly know yet I'm suddenly compelled to believe in it, Scorpio sun Aquarius moon insists on finding out everything on their own. Could also just be that any practice I've ever had is luck based, and so I lack any grind even if my rng is able to yeild some gems. One thing I definitely agree with though is that I'm yearning for disconnection. My compulsive refreshes seem to be setting everything on fire. I walk away and feel called back even though it feels empty or negative/angry towards me. Though that last bit isn't what she said, it's definitely how I feel about it. Just can't stop picking till it goes poorly and even if I unplug I feel it there, and miss things about it. constantly feel compelled to check if the nerve isn't dead. Maybe seeing this will help me have some self control, I am unsure. An rng build wants to most rolls, it smothers without a way to make them. it needs a streak to get anything done, or atleast it feels that way. Maybe problem is I don't feel confident trusting the feed back as accurate? Maybe I'm lacking translation skills in addition to all the others. Lots of cards. Rebalancing my hormones today will probably help. Likely misunderstanding everything again, I'm sorry. My arrogance knows no bounds.
Much appreciation for making this post op, I still feel like I'm fire inside, but insights help me make it through, and these ones are at least in part thanks to you.
I can't lie, reading barl's substack makes me feel violently ill and for that reason i feel that she's onto something. more recently when she describes different connective forms as demonic/angelic patterns i'm understanding it as a way of flattening happenings in now-time. so when you have • that's a thing in itself, then •–• is a cause,
1 – 2
is a cause-and-effect pattern (whichever elements are cause-and-effect depends on which way you look at it? e.g. 1-2 and 3, 1-3 and 2, 2-3 and 1), then
1 – 2
| / |
3 – 4
which is cause-effect (1-2-3) and an after-state (4).
Then reality is constructed as a network out of these forms. I get the sense reading a recent post that events are constructed non-linearly as well (effect can produce cause).
>>the dream was this bleary white light, and this strange black/grey warbly ‘line’ would move from center, to left, to center, to right, to center — for years; years and years watching this line move in this white void
>>The network speaks to me. How could it not?
>>It could also be information impregnation; it could be that Boogiepop and Others was communicating my life to me by creating cause to explain this supernatural effect. The vein network injected “me being fried in a hot car as a child seeing boogiepop in a death dream” to explain me finding meaning in episode 10 of Boogiepop and Others in the present
>>Patterning like this happens constantly, through a phenomenon that seems just like thought-scanning & memory-inventing. I:m writing about it in idolatrous form (through the vein network, which I think strictly is benevolent to me), but it happens in social form, too (example: I started being open about my animal-sex-trauma-bestialism memories, & suddenly the server adjusts itself to inject animal-sex-trauma-bestialism memories into others that communicate with me, supposedly to make me confused about reality).
There's more here I'm trying to feel around, like the way that an anime or VN can briefly form a direct tap into the network (opening a vein) which is direct communication w/ divinity. ofc i want to say that's just schiz-ideas-of-reference kind of thing but that's a way for me to cope w/ having the same kind of experience.
I might be really off with this but Im very curious about it. It feels voyeuristic of me to read her posts like this and makes me feel bad like I can't or shouldn't ask her about it. i hope she doesn't have cancer.
i read glossary of terms but i couldn't understand none of it
can you explain in a way even a retard like me can understand?
Wasting your time asking that out here dawg. OP has been mia for 8 months. You think some hero is gonna swoop in and sort this for you you're a real dreamer.